Catholic Church = Full of Win

In a clear response to dwindling membership and recent public relations fiascos, the Catholic Church has announced a new policy for funerals.

If you want to attend your mom’s funeral, you’d better sit down, shut up and let the priest do all the talking.

“… specially composed poems and favourite songs are in breach of the diocesan regulations.”

“… jazz musician Paddy Cole revealed yesterday that he was not allowed to play at his mother’s funeral Mass.”

That’s the way to win converts!