League Review

I didn’t like it.

I didn’t like the fact that the film’s only resemblence to the source material was that the same characters are in it.

I didn’t like the way it assumed the audience wouldn’t recognize the characters and spent precious minutes explaining them.

I didn’t like the way it killed nearly every Victoriana reference from the book.

I didn’t like the dialogue.

I didn’t like the acting.

I didn’t like how they changed the characters… made them all two-dimensional.

Mina is NOT a harlot, Quartermain is NOT indestructable, Hyde is NOT a misunderstood hero, the Invisible Man is NOT “funny,” Nemo is NOT a kung-fu artist, and Dorian Gray IS NOT IN THE FUCKING BOOK.

And, finally, I didn’t like how Hollywood always assumes it can make things better. “Oh, this is a fine piece of work, and we’ll buy it because we perceive it has value… but then we’ll change it all around and make it ‘better.'”

But Mina was hot. I liked that.