The Inebriated Paul Tevis Random Accent Generator and Other Tales: An Orc Con 08 After Action Report

“I hate this game.”

That’s what

[info]mattcolville

 said to me, his hands holding the combat wheel. His eyes were wide with concentration, considering acceptable losses. His voice and face had that look of sincere comic insincerity that only a few men can do. Matt does it very well. Then, he looked up at me again, the same look in his eyes, the same voice.

“And John? I hate you.”

We were playing Dune: one of my favorite board games. Matt introduced the game to me and I’ve made playing the game with Matt at every con a goal. I love playing games with Matt. He falls into the category of people who teach me as I watch them play. He’s a much better player than I am, much more familiar with the game, and I learn every time we play together. He’s also a good sport about both winning and losing–something else I appreciate greatly.

“You know what I hate about games without dice, John?” he asked me. I shook my head. “You can only blame yourself when things go wrong.”

The Dune game was on Saturday and I had already burned most of the fuel in my tank. I was running Houses of the Blooded games all weekend. My second primary goal (the first to play Dune with Matt). The games went very well. Two games Friday, Saturday and Sunday each: full, with multiple alternates. I got a wide spectrum of players–those familiar with the game, unfamiliar with the game, ready to accept the narrative focus of task resolution, etc. The players took a moment or two adjusting to the new concepts, but then jumped in with eager feet. Everyone was laughing and taking extensive notes. At the end of each game, everyone gave me an enthusiastic thumbs up. I told them, “Be sure to talk about the game on your blogs!” They all promised. We’ll see what happens.

I thought about playing in one of the LARPS but reconsidered. My faithful companion 

attempted to play in a gangster LARP that fell through. She spent most of the weekend taking notes while I ran the game, making sure I always had a key to the room I was staying in, and ran out to the grocery store, coming back with six bags full of food when we discovered the lack of affordable local fare.

Sunday, I had two scheduled games. Both went well. The second saw some old friends showing up to play my game. Afterward, they asked me to come out to the old apartment (the BNL song was going through my head) to run the game there for more folks.

 showed up and played as well. We went until the wee hours and drove back to the hotel, crashing after more than 14 hours of running my game.

Monday, I was dead, but I still found enough energy to play a game of Sons of Liberty. I picked up the game earlier (along with the handsome t-shirt) and 

 and I got to play with Josh. I played Thomas Payne and

 played the Martin Sisters. Fun was had by all. My favorite mechanic for the game–and one of my favorite mechanics in just about any game–is how the Game Master can thwart the plans of the players. The card he plays represents the actions of the British or their sympathizers, abusing the natural liberties of the colonists. Thus, the number on the card–from one to ten–corresponds with the Bill of Rights. “Play an ace to break up groups of colonists or shut down communications… play a deuce to disarm colonists of any weapons… play a six to convict colonists of any crime and sentence them to imprisonmen, hard labor or death…” Like I said, this is one of my favorite mechanics in just about any game, sitting right up there with using Zerner cards in Conspiracy X for the psychic powers system. Damn clever, damn fun, and damn I wish I had thought of it.

Monday was also the day Los Angeles almost killed the aforementioned Josh. At the restaurant, the chicken he ordered came out rotten. Not “rotten” in a metaphorical way, but “rotten” in “this meat is spoiled and I’m gonna get some kind of poisoning if I swollow” kind of way. Then, the over-priced restaurant didn’t remove the dish from the table’s bill. Bad form.

 took care of that.

Monday was also the day we discovered the Inebriated Paul Tevis Random Accent Generator. Apparently, the Mighty Mighty Paul Tevis adopts local color when he has one too many. In Irish pubs, he develops a brogue. In honky tonk bars, he picks up a drawl. I’d like to see what happens if we give him one too many swigs of Romulan Ale at the Star Trek Experience.

The flight home was uneventful. We watched lights out the window. Found the car in parking, drove home, ate Chef Boyardee and crashed out just in time to get four hours of sleep before my shift on Teusday. My twelve hour shift of assisting priests and nuns with computer problems. Which is where I am now, writing this between angry calls, remembering my weekend and all the great people I got to see.

Oh, and Matt? I hate you, too. See you in May.

Play Dirty: The Nuremberg Defense

(from a thread on RPG.net)

How do you handle the Nuremberg Defense? You know it. You’ve seen it. It’s been used on you. You’ve used it.

It goes something like this…

Jerk Player (after killing/robbing/screwing over another player’s character): “Sorry, I’m only playing my character!”

This selfish asswipe thinks his fun is more important than anyone else’s fun and he’s justifying it by saying “That’s what my character would do!” ignoring all other factors. Usually, Jerk-off’s character gains something from the exchange. He picks another character’s pocket or he steals something from the combined loot or some other act of complete dickery.

That’s fine. That’s fine.  GMs and players, I have a solution for this.

When it happens at my table, I give the Jerk-off a kind smile and say, “A bolt of blue lightning strikes down and kills your character dead-dead-dead. He’s a little blob of quivering jelly.”

Then, I pause. And I say, “Sorry, I’m only being the GM.”

Dickery goes both ways, pal.

Strategicon: Houses Games

The Art of Revenge
Friday 3:00 & 8:00 PM
Sunday 3:00 PM
Injury and Insult. Sharp words and a sharper knife. Your sister was left in a pool of blood and tears… and it is time for the sacred and holy Art of Revenge.

A one-shot story for up to six players. Leave your mercy at home.

Roses and Thorns
Saturday 3:00 & 8:00 PM
Sunday 8:00 PM
Young, beautiful and dangerous. Lady Shara Yvarai’s coming out party will draw handsome young nobles from all across Shanri. An opportunity for trade, for Romance… and murder.

Roses and Thorns is a one-shot story for up to six players. Bring your wit, your charm, and your favorite hidden dagger.

What is John Doing? (Part 2)

Investor Group Poised to Back Oakland Entertainment Producers

Oakland — Oakland’s Incubate Group Corp. is planning investments of up to $1 million each in several local women- and black-owned multi media gaming, video and other digital entertainment companies.

The group has signed letters of intent to invest between $200,000 and $1 million in each of seven companies since December, including two animated cartoon producers, a role-playing game author and a foreign language education company. It is readying paperwork with White & Lee LLP to launch a venture fund that will manage both the seed and eventual “graduation” funding it plans to award to between five and 10 companies later in the year.

Friends Only

I’ve updated my journal to “Friends Only.”

I’ve attracted a lot of attention and comments from people I don’t neccessarily want to associate with, and while I allowed my patience to be tried, the last couple of days have really killed any patience I had left.

Also, lots of big changes are coming down the pike. You’ll see what I mean soon.

I have no idea what this means…

… but I’m sure someone is going to tell me. 🙂

(Inspired by )

Asha Greyjoy

You scored 0 Adaptability, 0 Humor, 0 Integrity and 0 Activity!

My mother raised me to be bold.

You are Asha Greyjoy.

Also called The Kraken’s Daughter, you’re as bold as they come… and as clever, too. You’re adventurous and you’ve got a devilish sense of humor. You have a lot of poise and are able to deal with negative situations well. You are often restless. You feel that you were born to lead, no matter what anyone else may think. You have a practical view of the world and you’re a bit of a prankster. You are not a romantic and have little patience for people who are. You are fierce, lively, and unconventional.

You are also similar to Theon Greyjoy and Arya Stark. Your polar opposite is Bran Stark.

Link: The Song of Ice and Fire Personality Test written by freedomdegrees on Ok Cupid
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