(The following conversation is real. It took place just outside the mall across the street from my work.)
EXT. DAY – FOOD COURT ENTRANCE
(JOHN walks by a blue NEWS VAN. Standing beside a TABLE of COKE and PEPSI, he sees a tall BLONDE with long legs and a short skirt holding a microphone. A CAMERA MAN clues in on John as the Blonde approaches.)
BLONDE: Excuse me, sir.
JOHN: (dismissive) I’m not interested.
BLONDE: We’re doing research…
JOHN: (stopping) Research?
BLONDE: Yes, we want to find out if you…
JOHN: (interrupting) Wait a second. You mean to tell me that soda is the news?
BLONDE: (a little tentative) We…
JOHN: Did you hear the Vice President signed oil contracts while he was still CEO of that company of his — and sent Bush a letter in 1997 dictating a strategy of removing Hussein from power to maintain those contracts indefinately?
BLONDE: (looking back at the camera man) Uh… well…
JOHN: And you’re doing research. (leaving) See you at 6:00.